Poor Hubby… aka The Abuser

Everyone knows that my hubby is the sweetest man in the world. Really it’s extremely annoying, my family and friends believe he can do no wrong.  If my hubby and I have an argument and I go to my girlfriends to vent, they’ll ask me what did I do to cause it… ME!?! They’re supposed to be MY girlfriends, but no their loyalty will go to hubby first because he’s so “wonderful”.

So even though what happened this weekend was awful and extremely distressing for my hubby, I am enjoying it… GREATLY! I know, I know I’m a horrible person, get over it.

So as you know I have a beaut of a black eye from softball.  And I have to say I’m pretty proud of it, especially now that it’s turning a lovely shade of purple with a light tint of green. Which I was trying to get my hubby to admire as we were walking down the hallway of our apartment building.

“No really honey look, isn’t it pretty!?”

“Ya babe it’s the most beautiful black eye I’ve ever seen”

“You don’t mean it, YOU’RE NOT EVEN LOOKING!!  Come on look honey this is my worst looking black eye of them all!”

“Well honey, if you didn’t have such a smart mouth I wouldn’t have to keep giving them to you.”

Before I can laugh at his joke, we come around the corner and bumped into Mrs. Cooper, our kindly elderly neighbor, with her dog Poopsie (not his real name, but that’s what I call him because I can tell it pisses him off, and that’s what he gets for waking me up on Saturdays with his barking.)

“Morning Mrs. Cooper, Hello Poopsie, who’s a poopsie, poopsie, poopsie puppy.” I say, giving him a full body rub down causing his fur to stick up in all directions (again another thing Poopsie hates and I enjoy doing greatly). 

But instead of giving Hubby and I a big smile and asking how our day is going, like she usually does, Mrs. Cooper placed a hand on my shoulder and squeezed, then gave hubby a death stare and walked away with Poopsie.

Hubby looked confused, “What was that?”

I too was confused for a minute… “OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD, OH MY GOD!” I say now jumping up and down in horror and excitement.

“She heard you!!! She doesn’t know you were joking.  She thinks you gave me this black eye, that’s… AWESOME!”  I’m screaming with laughter as I open our door.

Hubby is not as amused, “No she doesn’t… she can’t… she likes me… she calls me the sweety boy.”

I laughed, “not anymore, now you’re the abuser.”


About But That's For Another Blog

Wifey, Blogger,Dog Mom, Huge Nerd, and One Hellofafriend! (Seriously, I have references). SHINY!!
This entry was posted in Humor and tagged , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Poor Hubby… aka The Abuser

  1. Oh, I love that story! This kinda crap has happened on occasion to me and mine too. We have a bad habit of bantering at the gas station, Casey’s convenience story, Dollar General…well, actually everywhere we go. I’ll be a smart-ass about something, my husband will tell me to go sit in the truck, I’ll tell him to shove it..he ain’t getting me to shut up that easy, he’ll say something like “Don’t make me dot both your eyes again”, etc. Now most people that know us in town love this, cause they’re used to us. In fact, we often hear that we are their favorite couple. Occasionally though, we’ll come across someone that has no idea we are joking, and I just roll with laughter because they truly think he’s going to take me home and kick my ass. It’s then that I have to tell them he’s smarter than that, cause he’d have to be wielding a mighty big club and have friends for back-up.
    Just love that story! Milk it girlfriend!

  2. my0wneyes says:

    LOL…pretty funny

  3. SEE?!?! It’s hard to feel bad for him when it’s so DAMN funny 😀

  4. Susan says:

    How many times can I tell you I love you Mona!?!? These blogs are awesome!

    PS: I love Tony too!

  5. SilentMyth says:

    hahahaha.. i cant stop laughing .. love your blog.. can you believe i just read your blog while i am at work.. *ooopps.. need to get back to work*

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