1. Eigh pints of Guinness will leave you legally blind for the night. Please only test this if you have a trustworthy friend that will stay with you during the entire night and not leave cause they think you’re joking… KAMI!!
2. Eating asparagus makes your pee smell like asparagus. Ok you probably think you already knew this one, BUT did you know if you take one bite of asparagus and then go pee it still smells like it. How is that possible?! One bite and it hasn’t even gone through your system yet!? I was blown away. Side lesson learned, don’t ask the person in the stall next to you to smell it.
3. When you throw up ice cream, it’s still cold and comes up like a milkshake. It’s gross, yet kinda cool, yet gross, yet…
4. No matter how sweet you think your cat is never EVER pet an exposed belly. Even if she’s purring and meowing at you to rub it, Don’t Do It! IT’S A TRAP!!
5. Patron Silver Tequila will never give you a hangover! It’s true, this has been seriously tested. I’ve gotten hangovers on ever drink known to man BUT Patron Silver Tequila… it’s a miracle elixir.
6. The Lemonade Diet totally works, it will also totally put you in the worst mood of your entire life and you will kill a family member before you reach your desired weight goal. But positive side, you will look great! Negative side, you’re prison mate Big Bertha will think so too.
7. European tire jacks are not like US tire jacks. Learn this before you have a blown tire in Ireland on a road that’s not on the map your best friend/navigator/evil nemesis told you to go on, while you’re suffering from an 8 pint guinness hangover… KAMI!
8. A black eye that bleeds will heal faster than one that doesn’t.
9. Three cups of coffee in an hour, while fun, will clean your system out so be close to a bathroom and for the love of god not in a meeting… so learned the hard way.
10. … ok so I ran out of things I know that you may not so I IM’d Tif for one and this is what she sent me. “Eric Stoltz was originally cast to play Marty McFly in Back to the Future but he wasn’t funny enough so it was given to Micheal J. Fox.”