You would think that with 34 years of experience being a fair-skinned, freckled Irish gal, I would know that the Sun is not my friend… in fact it hates my fucking guts.
I got burned…
It’s not pretty…
And now EVERY person in my office has to tell me this.
Guy in Elevator: WHOA! Look at you! Get some sun?
Me: No… Why? Oh My God, I’m Red All Over! WHAT’S WRONG WITH ME!?
Receptionist: Did you get burned!?
Me: Not as much as you do on a regular basis… OOHHH BURN!
Manager: Ever heard of sunscreen?
Me: Ever heard of breath fresheners?
Creepy Janitor: Are you sunburned everywhere?
Me: Hey! The restraining order says 50 feet, move it back buddy!
Chipper Cubical Neighbor: Oh my gosh! You’re sunburned! Does it hurt?
I decided right then and there that if one more person walked up to me and said the word ‘Sunburn’ I would kill myself. And that’s when Tif walked up…
Tif: Way to go Dumb Ass.
Me: Oh God Thank You!