Country Life = Horney Chickens and Pissed Off Birds

So my parents have bought the farm… AH! No, seriously they’ve  retired to their little farm.  So Hubby and I went up and visited them last week and learned a little more about farming then we really needed to know.

Me: Dad I can’t believe you have chickens and they’re so cute!  I love how they follow you around.

Dad: … I know, I gotta get a rooster.

Me: Why? Wont that be annoying with it all kakadoodiling every morning?

Dad: No!

Mom: *snicker*

Me: What am I missing?

Mom: Yes honey, tell your daughter why you want a rooster.

Dad: The chickens… well the chickens… squat at me… Ellen stop laughing!

Mom: Sorry dear *snicker*

Me:… Okay I’m new to farm life but don’t you want the chickens to squat? Doesn’t squatting equal eggs?

Dad: That’s not why they’re doing it… Ellen if you can’t control yourself, you can leave!

Mom: Sorry dear *snicker*

Me: … okay so if they’re not squatting to lay eggs, why are they squatting?

Dad: because… well… because…

Mom: BECAUSE THEY’RE WAITING FOR YOUR FATHER TO MOUNT THEM!

Dad: ELLEN!!

Me: WHAT!? DAD NO EEEEEEEEYYYYYYYWWWWWWW!

Dad: I know!! It’s disgusting, they think I’m the head of the flock and well that’s what the head of the flock does.  So I’m getting a rooster to be the new head of the flock.

Me:… wow… dad… I mean… wow

SMACK!

Mom: Dammit!

Me: Holy Cow! Mom that bird just totally kamikazed into the window.

Mom: I know!  I put up fake flower garland over the windows to stop them and it was kind of working.

Me: Why’d you take it down?

Mom: The hummingbirds were mistaking them for real flowers and they would just hover there looking at me accusingly.  I couldn’t take it.

Me:  Wow, farm life is tough… or should I say it’s … FOR THE BIRDS!!! HUH?! HUH?! Oh come on give me some that was pretty funny.

Mom: …

Dad: …

Me: Whatever.

Ya I know, I'm going to hell for this one... but come on that's pretty damn funny!

About But That's For Another Blog

Wifey, Blogger, Cat Slave, New Puppy Mommy, Huge Nerd, and One Hellofafriend! (Seriously, I have references). SHINY!!
This entry was posted in Humor and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

8 Responses to Country Life = Horney Chickens and Pissed Off Birds

  1. A little bit of research before starting a new adventure goes a long way…but then again, it wouldn’t be as much of an adventure, would it? Funny stuff!

  2. They love it, they’ve had this property forever but now they can finally do all the farming stuff they’ve wanted to since they both retired.

  3. Shonnie says:

    Hahaha! That is funny! Squatting chickens! haha! I hope he gets his rooster fast! 🙂

    Thanks for the smile.

  4. Nick says:

    BAHAHAHAAHA! That picture was truly the icing on the cake.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s