I’m A Total Disappointment To My Childhood Self

So I was walking to work today and saw a Jeep drive by, which got me thinking.

I should totally buy a Jeep, I’ve wanted one ever since I was a little kid.  That’s it, I’m buying a Jeep and marking it off my childhood aspirations list. Ahhh, that felt good.  I like marking things off lists.  So what else was on my CAL? (Childhood Aspirations List… keep up people).

1. Buy Jeep – DONE

2. Get a dog – … ok I don’t have a dog, I have a cat… BUT my cat works for the CIA and I’m pretty sure is currently working on a plan to become the supreme ultra lord of the planet, which a dog would never think of doing, so – DONE

3. Move to NY – … ok I didn’t move to NY… BUT I did move to LA and it’s also a 2 letter place, only it’s in the opposite direction of NY, but since I’ve never been great with directions I’m gonna mark that as – DONE

4. Be a Movie Star – … ok I haven’t been in a movie… BUT I was in a commercial for the bookstore I worked at in college.  I played the ditzy blonde, I really had to study hard to prepare for that role… HA and – DONE

5. Have handsome boyfriends but NEVER GET MARRIED – … ok I did have an extremely handsome boyfriend and I married him… BUT by marring him I got awesome things! Like tax breaks, and the freedom to let myself go (a little… ok a lot), and a lifer designated driver, and someone who is always there to kill spiders (remember how much we hate spiders), and there’s that little fact that he’s our soul mate,  so buck up kid and – DONE

6. Travel All Over The World – ok… I haven’t traveled ALL over the World BUT I have traveled to Canada, Mexico, Ireland, Washington, Idaho, Montana, Wyoming, California, Oregon, Arizona, Nevada, and Louisiana!  And hey those are all IN the World so – DONE.

7. Have an exciting job – ok… I had an exciting job as an events/promotions account executive.  I met famous people and also developed ulcers from the stress. So I quit and moved to Oregon to be an assistant at an accounting firm… granted not as exciting but excellent health plan and 401K,  PLUS no ulcers, so – DONE

Ok kid I’m sure you’re reading this thinking what a bunch of baloney she hasn’t done anything I wanted to do.  To that I say HEY LAY OFF YOU LITTLE BRAT! Did you ever think your aspirations were a little too high and not to mention SHALLOW?!  What about aspiring for health and happiness and awesome friendships and loving families and a life that makes you smile every day! Huh how about that!?! Didn’t think about wishing for that did you? 

But since you’re going to grow up to be this totally awesome, kick ass woman I’m gonna let you off with a warning.  Stop stressing about what the future holds and enjoy the present… and don’t go on that road trip to Montana your senior year… trust me.

About But That's For Another Blog

Wifey, Blogger, Cat Slave, New Puppy Mommy, Huge Nerd, and One Hellofafriend! (Seriously, I have references). SHINY!!
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8 Responses to I’m A Total Disappointment To My Childhood Self

  1. Sharon says:

    “BUT I did move to LA and it’s also a 2 letter place” nice one. Loved your title for this post too. I’m sometimes disappointed with my childhood-self and all the uncrossed things on my CAL list. Especially when I’ve run into anyone from high school. Cringe.

    • OOHHH hate running in from people from my childhood. But ya know they’re lying out their asses about there “wonderful life” so I just screw with them. Won the lottery 5 times, married Brad Pitt (he and Angelina are keeping up the “together” fasad for the children) and currently working wtih the president on world peace. 😀

  2. It’s good to have goals, and all your goals seem just deep enough for a little girl. Now that you’re a big girl, I’d like to hear your Big Girl Goals (besides buying a Jeep). What color was it by the way–that’s always my most important criteria in a vehicle…

  3. notquiteold says:

    Very funny. And I think it is perfectly legit to revise your goals retroactively.

  4. Nick says:

    Our CAL’s are so similar it’s scary! Of course mine also had massive contradictions such as “don’t go to college” and “become a quirky lawyer like Ally McBeal” within bullet points of each other… Needless to say, I’ve done the exact opposite of both.

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