As a mention in my home shopping debacle post, I went to a wine tasting last week. And like all my wine tastings it was AWESOME! However, this wine tasting was a little more awsomer then the others. Like all truly awesomey things it came in 3 awesome parts.
Awesome Part #1: After taking a tour of the owners wine making room in the back of the cafe, Susan and I decided we were going to make our own wine, in her garage.
Susan: I can’t belive we haven’t thought of this before, it’s genius!
Me: I KNOW! I’m totally excited. We can make a whole barrel of wine!
Susan: Oh a barrel… how many grapes do we need to make a barrel of wine?
Owner Dude: About 800 pounds.
Me:… that’s a lot of grapes, we’re gonna need a bigger garage.
Owner Dude: Well that’s for a full size barrel, they have smaller barrels too.
Susan: Yay, smaller barrels!
Me: I can’t wait till we tap that mini barrel for our yummy creation.
Susan: *GASP* Mona, you just named our wine.
Me: I did… Yummy Creation? That seems a little boring for us.
Susan: No… Tap That!
Me: Oh Hell YA!!!
Owner Dude: That’s actually not a bad name.
Susan and Me: PATENT PENDING!!
Awesome Part #2: I was NOT the drunkest person there… HA!
Drunk Girl: HI! I’M SARAH
Susan: Hi Sarah, I’m …
Sarah: HA HA! MY NAME’S NOT SARAH!
Susan: Oh, sorry I thought you…
Drunk Girl: NO WAIT!… MY NAME IS SARAH… WOW… ISN’T THAT CRAZY!?!
Me: Ya, I can honestly say you just blew my mind. Oh, someone just called your name.
Sarah: REALLY!?! WHERE!?!?
Me: Outside and down the street about 4 blocks.
Sarah: WOW, OKAY BETTER GO THEN!! BYE!!!
Susan: You’re a bitch, but god I love you.
Awesome Part #3: I bought Hubby the greatest gift of all time!
(sorry Rich this even beats out your Awesome Gift.)
Kim: Mona stop staring at me, I told you I don’t go that way.
Me: … Wow… um ok number one I was only joking about that! And number two I was looking at the picture behind you.
Me: Dude! That’s Grig from The Last Starfighter. Hubby loves that movie.
Kim: Well it’s on sale, for $100 it’s all yours.
Me: I’m totally getting it. I’m gonna call Hubby, he’ll be so excited!
And I did… and he wasn’t… well at least not at first.
Me: Honey it’s me! I just bought you something AWESOME!
Hubby: No you didn’t.
Me: Ya I did.
Hubby: No you didn’t, I have an app that alerts me whenever you use the debit card and you haven’t bought anything in the last hour except 2 bottles of wine. By the way stop buying wine, you’ve had enough.
Me: Seriously!? You track my card… I feel so violated! And trust me compared to some of the other people here my drinking is way below par. AND I didn’t use my debit card… I used my credit card.
Hubby: No, I cut all those up!
Me: You missed one, but you’re missing the point! I bought YOU something AWESOME!
Hubby: How much was it?
Me: Babe that diminishes the gift when you know how much it was.
Hubby: How much.
Hubby: Which means it was really $100,
Me: How did you…
Hubby: Babe, I’m so on to your ways.
Me: You know what? Screw you, I’m keeping Grig for myself!
Hubby: Grig? From The Last Starfighter?
Me: Yep, it’s a big awesome picture of him and all kinds of other cool starfighter stuff behind him, and it’s all mine… not yours.
Hubby: Too late you already said it was for me, no take backs.
Me: It’s not a take back if I never gave it to you, I… oh shit.
Sarah: HI! WHO’S THIS? I’M SARAH!?
After that I had a tug a war with Sarah for the phone, which I won, but Hubby was no long there, because he was on his way to the cafe to stake claim to his picture.
2 bottles of wine – $24
1 Awesome picture – $100
Getting Hubby to one of my wine events – Priceless