As you know SOMEONE has been emailing me as my cat, CIA Cat. Now, at first, I declared this awesome and began the hunt of finding out who was the mystery emailer. However, the joy of not knowing quickly faded, becoming less awesome and more aggravating. Add on to that the fact that ALL my friends knew the identity of the emailer.
The straw that broke this bloggers back was when I discovered CIA Cat had voted for me for Best Humor Blog in the Blogger’s Choice Awards.
… COME ON!! That’s taking it TOO FAR!!!
In a fit, I went on Facebook and declared I would no longer post CIA Cat’s emails on my Blog. All my “friends” declared I was a spoil-sport and demanded to know how it was possible I had no idea who the emailer was… I had ideas.
1. Susan – She mentioned CIA Cat should have a Facebook page before the emails started, so she had CIA Cat and the internet on the brain.
2. Ashley – Many people have said that the CIA Cat emails sound a lot like my writing. Since Ashley and I are equal in awesomeness, she’s an obvious choice. Add on to that her disturbing attraction to Puss in Boots.
3. Juanita – A BIG fan of my blog and after she sent me her online dating bio to review, I discovered she’s a freaking hilarious writer. example, “I’m looking for someone I can have interesting conversations with that wont have to be retold later in a courtroom.”
So in response to my Facebook threat, I received a good-bye email from CIA Cat yesterday with a clue to who the mystery emailer is…
From: CIA CAT
RE: I Bid You Adieu!
CIA Cat here – and I believe it is time for me to bid you adieu! I have wrestled with conflicted feelings on this final e-mail and have found this is a feeling even Fancy Feast can’t temper. But before I do so, I leave you with these final words of wisdom:
“Just scolding one’s cat one looks into its face and is seized by the ugly suspicion that it understood every word, and has filed it for reference.”
“Understand, you can keep a dog; but it is the cat who keeps people, because cats find humans useful domestic animals.”
“A cat sees no good reason why it should obey another animal, even if it does stand on two legs.”
“Now some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel, true. And they have many other fine qualities as well.
“It is known even overweight cats instinctively know the cardinal rule: when fat, arrange yourself in slim poses.”
“There is the little matter of disposal of droppings in which the cat is far ahead of its rivals. The dog is somehow thrilled by what he or any of his friends have produced, hates to leave it, adores smelling it, and sometimes eats it…The cat covers it up if he can…”
“As anyone who has ever been around a cat for any length of time well knows cats have enormous patience with the limitations of the human kind.”
(P.S. – I have left you a coded message in the quotes above)
Do you see it?!?!?!?!
(hint – sometimes it’s best to go vertical instead of horizontal)