My blog had its 6-month anniversary last October. I felt bad when I realized this important milestone had passed and I had done nothing to celebrate this special occasion. So imagine my surprise that, after the realization of my forgetation, my blog was frozen…
At first I thought that I had written so much of myself into this little page that it had developed my attitude and was like “forget our anniversary, oh no you didn’t, well good luck trying to post something now!” But no that wasn’t it… sadly, cause how cool would that have been!
I noticed that at the top of my blog page was this sentence typed in red “WordPress has frozen your blog due to some questionable postings, please contact us immediately to resolve.”
SOME questionable postings? HA HA HA, but seriously this is serious, so I sent a reply email that they could contact me at anytime and waited. While waiting my mind was a flurry of possible posts that got me in trouble with “the man”.
Tif: WordPress is really strict about plagiarism.
Me: Dude, I write about my life… how is that plagiarism!?!?
Tif: Okay, well they really don’t like pornography.
Me: This could possibly be about my I almost castrated Hubby with the hammock post.
Tif: I think it’s okay to use the word castrate.
Me: Ya, well I kinda included a picture.
Tif: SHUT UP! Why don’t I remember this!?
Me: It wasn’t Hubby! It was a picture of an extremely attractive man on a hammock.
Tif: oh, now I remember, ya he was very attractive… and naked if I recall correctly.
Me: But his hand was resting on “it” so you really can’t see anything, so that’s okay right?
Me: I’m fucked.
Tif: Well that picture was at the bottom of the blog, maybe they didn’t see it.
Me: Ya, but remember the post I did after that one?
Tif: oh ya, you blogged about how hot the guy in the hammock was and reposted the picture.
Me: I couldn’t help it! It was a really good picture!
Tif: No, I agree, he was pretty.
Luckly WordPress got back to me pretty quickly and shed light on why I was frozen. I wasn’t in trouble for the guy in the hammock. I had “apparently” done something so “horrible” a law firm had contacted WordPress with a Cease and Desist order.
Okay, I’m trying to figure out how I can explain this without getting in trouble, again. I had posted a story about a block game my friend had made which resembled another block game that already exists, lets just say this block game rhymes with… Benga. And I had titled that post “GIANT *****… that is all”.
The letter stated the following (obviously my cease and desist was not important enough for a grammar check), “Because the this blog uses “Giant *****” to refer to a block game that is not our client’s ***** brand good, we request that you remove all use of “*****” on your website, to avoid the likelihood of public confusion and the dilution of the distinctive nature of our client’s ***** Trademark. In the future, please consider that ***** can only be used to refer to our client’s genuine ***** Brand goods.”
Tif: Don’t do it.
Tif: Don’t change anything.
Me: It’s a letter from a law firm.
Tif: So? It’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard. What do these guys do, Google that word until they find it mentioned in a stupid little blog and then harass them?
Tif: You know what I mean, besides they’re only “requesting”. I say screw them, keep the blog as it is.
Me:… I can’t, I’m a wuss! I may talk the big talkity talk, but when forced I just can’t walk the big walkity walk.
Tif: That can’t possibly be a real saying.
Me: Well it’s too late anyways. I changed the title of the blog to GIANT BLOCK GAME… that is all.
Tif: Not as funny
Me: I know… so sue me.
Tif: ha ha