So we’re all about getting healthy at work, and to help us on our path to nutrition nirvana, our trainer ,Jake, came in today to make us some wheat grass shots.

Not just any wheat grass shots, his “special” wheat grass shots, from the “special” grass that he grows in his “special” pallets in his “special” soil from his “special” back yard… seriously… this guy has a meditation back yard… I know, I didn’t know those existed either, but they do.  Apparently you need a pond, some trees, and koi fish for you to reach a legit meditation level.

Anywho, he brings his grass, his juicer to our office, and gets to work.  Now I’ve never had a wheat grass shot before, but seriously, how bad could it be?

BAD, it could be very, very, bad!  Especially if you’ve never had one before AND your co-worker keeps egging you on to take another shot, and another! Who ever wrote that shots, shots, shots, song… well they should be shot.

So three “special” wheat grass shots later…  I can see sound… seriously. Not only can I see sound, but sound and I are currently having an in depth conversation about the diverse quantizations of solar flares in relative equality to the weekly amount of nuts stored by squirrels… And I am absolutely certain, that if a squirrel came into my office right now, not only could I commune with him, but he would totally verify my solar flare to nut storage ratio theory!!!

… I keep burping lawn… I’m gonna go lie down…

Jake
aka “special” grass guy