So funny story, actually more awkward then funny, the awkwardest part being that I’m not the biggest weirdo in this story.
I don’t know if you guys have noticed, but it’s freaking cold outside. This is normal for some of you, but for us Arizonans it’s THE END OF THE WORLD… or something like that.
Well apparently I’m not the only one having a hard time with this new coldness, as I found out a couple days ago, when I walked to the bathroom and saw a gecko sitting on the toilet seat.
Me: BABE, there’s a gecko on the toilet! What do I do?
Hubby: Well stop staring, and give him some privacy, weirdo!
Me: HE’S NOT POOPING! HE’S JUST SITTING!
Hubby: WHY ARE YOU YELLING!?!
Me: …I DON’T KNOW… it’s Monday… and I just woke up… and I really have to pee.. AND THERE’S A FREAKING GECKO ON THE TOILET!!!!
Hubby finally made an appearance, scooping the gecko up, without hazard gloves or anything, and leaving the room.
Me:… Dude… You just picked him up with your bare hands!!! That was kinda hot.
Hubby (from the kitchen): Weirdo!
So I thought that was the end of it, until I got home that night, and saw a box on the kitchen table. Being a normal person I lifted the lid off the box and was instantly attacked by a million little crickets hopping for freedom.
Me: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH I’M GONNA DIE, I KNEW IT WAS GONNA BE BY CRICKETS, I JUST KNEW IT AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
Hubby: BABE! WHAT DID YOU DO!?!?
Hubby: Those were for George!
Me (stopping my frenzied hopping around the living room):… who and what now?
Hubby: George, the gecko. It was too cold to let him out, so I got a box for him and he’s living in the closet until it gets warmer out.
Me:… you named him George?
Hubby: What, I thought it was a good name.
Me: It is… it’s just so something I would do!
Hubby: Great, now I’m the weirdo.
Me: You kinda are, now excuse me I have to go take a shower and burn these clothes.
Hubby: Help me get the crickets back in the box first!
Me (I looked back to the dining room): Too late…. Orko ate them.
Hubby: BAD DOG!
Hello 2015, looks like you’re going to be as interesting as 2014 was.