Orko being the lovable klutz that he is somehow managed to rip a part of his paw pad while going pee in front of the house… he’s talented.

I can tell you this now in a calm, peaceful, joking demeanor… but during the incident I was of a different character.

Bursting through the doorway carrying a confused Orko with all 4 paws straight up in the air.

Me: ORKO’S HURT!!!!!

Hubby: What!? How!? Where!?!

Me: DON’T GET ALL REPORTER ON ME MAN! WHERE’S THE BANDAGES!?!?

Hubby: Well at least let me see!

Me: DON’T TOUCH HIM!! I DON’T KNOW WHERE THE INJURY IS!!!

Hubby: Then how do you know he’s hurt!?

Me: HE LIMPED!!!

Hubby: He limped… as in singular?

Me: WHAT AM I SUCH A HORRIBLE PERSON THAT I’M GOING TO MAKE HIM PROVE THE DEPTH OF HIS INJURY?!?! ONE LIMP IS GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME!!

Hubby: Okay wacko, put him down and let me see what we’re dealing with.

And I did, and we found a little piece of skin hanging off his paw. Hubby then suggested we just cut the piece off ourselves and then bandage it up. I agreed, but first asked that he showed me his diploma from graduating vet school, with honors! He then reiterated I was a wacko, which I ignored and went off to call a real vet.

2 hours later Orko was back home with a wrapped paw, some antibiotic pills, and a truly pissed off mommy.

Me: I CAN’T BELIEVE SHE SAID WE COULD HAVE DONE THAT OURSELVES!? WHO DOES SHE THINK SHE IS!?!?

Hubby: Well per the diploma on her wall, someone who graduated from vet school… with honors.

A very cranky Orko on mandatory couch rest.