Category Archives: Humor

Turkducken the myth, the legend, the possible explosion…

Me: I’m thinking of doing a Turkducken for Thanksgiving this year! Chicken, in a Duck, in a Turkey!! Hubby: Well it was a nice apartment while it lasted. Me: I am like 63% certain nothing will catch fire this time. … Continue reading

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How my butt nearly ended my marriage

Me: Is this a spider bite or a pimple? Hubby: Ah babe come on, I haven’t even had my coffee yet, I’m gonna need you to pull your pants back up. Me: HEY! This is marriage! You said I do … Continue reading

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Apparently, by being a sane, nice person this Halloween, I’m actually ruining everything for everyone… yay… go me.

Hubby: So what’s the theme this year? Me: Theme for what? Hubby: Halloween. Me: oh… ya… I though we could just skip it this year. Hubby: Holy Shit. SKIP HALLOWEEN!?! WHAT!? WHY!? You always do Halloween, to the extreme! You … Continue reading

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The Martian+Gin+Me = Hubby Asking What He Did To Deserve This Life

Hubby: “… let me just make sure I’m following along with you, Matt Damon’s character would have never gotten off Mars, if it hadn’t been for the NASA guy’s Executive Assistant?” Me: “YES!” Hubby: “… how?” Me: “Oh my god … Continue reading

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I went from telling you how to lose friends and alienate people this October, to creating a new inappropriate for work word… WINNING!

I have a secret. A secret that could end friendships, alienate me from family members, and basically make me a social outcast to normal society. I DON’T LIKE PUMPKIN SPICE!! *pause for horrified gasps from the reader* I know, I … Continue reading

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I ate my feelings and now I make my yoga pants cry.

“Why are you naked?” That’s a good question, to be asked in elevators, restaurants, planes, and churches. NOT to be asked by your hubby when you’re standing in your own bedroom. “Excuse me?” Another good question, to be asked when … Continue reading

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2018 and people can’t stop giving me money… it sucks.

So I don’t know about the rest of you, but the first day back after the holiday season is tough, especially when you’re someone like me who took 2 weeks off. Just the fact that I was able to roll … Continue reading

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