Tag Archives: evil

How I broke my friend and made her question her life, all while I didn’t watch the Bachelor

I wish I liked the Bachelor, so many of my friends like that show and listening to them each morning losing their shit over who did what, who wasn’t picked, who was picked, who kissed who, who didn’t kiss who, who … Continue reading

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I’ve become a pageant mom and I don’t even have a child… well not technically

Okay, so there’s this contest AZFoothills Magazine has each year for Arizona’s Cutest Dog , and this year I entered Orko.  I mean come on, look at that face! Now I mistakenly thought this was going to be a fair … Continue reading

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Emmy was hit by a garbage truck… I was struck blind… and everyone laughed… bastards.

SO, a girl I work with was in a fender bender yesterday, and today, everyone was sharing car accident stories with her to make her feel better.  After I finished telling my horribly sad story, everyone was laughing… bastards… here’s the … Continue reading

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My evil magical billowy pants are trying to kill me

The only reason I can think of why my pants are trying to kill me, is because they don’t fit.  I’ve packed on a couple pounds since I bought the pants and I’m not able to zip them up all the … Continue reading

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My 1st Grade Teacher is the Reason Why Dried Fruit Makes Me Cry… Part 1

So I was listening to Daria, Mitch and Ted on 105.1 The Buzz on the radio last night.  Daria was telling one of her HILARIOUS childhood stories, about a crazy teacher she had when she was young, and it got … Continue reading

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I blame my death on Mad Eye Pete!… and syphilis…

So Tracy, Tricia and I threw pretty much the most diabolical awesomely evil surprise birthday party for Ashley last weekend… But that’s for another blog.  Don’t freak, I know I say that and then never blog about it again, but … Continue reading

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Dornish Wine: Best Paired with Revenge, but Only When Served Cold

So you all remember my “friend” Jake and his little Dornish wine gag he pulled on me a couple months ago. And if you remember I swore I would get my revenge, preferably with an elephant.  Well the elephant thing … Continue reading

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